


telling us all to go free

by theprincessed



Series: Aaron Week 2018 [5]
Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Aaron Dingle POV, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fist Fights, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Murder-Suicide, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-16
Updated: 2018-11-16
Packaged: 2019-08-20 09:50:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16553513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theprincessed/pseuds/theprincessed
Summary: Aaron is helping out at the garage when a visitor arrives with unfinished business.(Day 5: Fear)





	telling us all to go free

**Author's Note:**

> Hiya! This was the first one I wrote for the week and I enjoyed the drama so much that I made the insane decision to try and write for all the days lol. I didn't mean for this to go the way it did, but it's kinda cool...in a sick, dramatic, soapy way.
> 
> Title from one of my all-time favourite songs, _Letters from the Sky_ by Civil Twilight.
> 
> Hope you enjoy x

Aaron switches the garage radio to another station as he walks past, his gaze trained on some paperwork in his other hand and half of his mind on the time. He's meant to be meeting Robert for lunch so he's trying to finish a job on an old black Volvo. It's been years since he's flexed his mechanic muscles, but Cain is away on holiday and Debbie is looking after Jack and Sarah, her daughter still recovering from her heart transplant, so Aaron had offered to do the odd shift at the garage to keep things ticking over in their absence, Ross having relinquished his share again since leaving the village. In truth, sometimes Aaron misses being here, so it's nice to still have a hand in the family business and even better when he can do it on a day that Dan isn't getting under his feet or incessantly yapping.

He can listen to the music he likes, fix the cars on the agenda and then go home to his flat and his family or, like today, meet them halfway through the day because it's a domestic, lovely thing to do. His mouth twitches upwards when he thinks of how smart ( _fit_ ) Robert looked in his suit that morning, off to see a client that needed schmoozing and if there's one thing he knows it's how to be charming and suddenly Aaron can't wait to see him. As soon as the thought comes to him, he shakes his head at himself. This is who he is now; internally soppy about his husband, pitching in to help at a former job and simply...happy.

Aaron puts the paperwork back in the office then picks up what he needs from the toolbox and turns towards the Volvo again. Lying back on the roller seat, he disappears underneath the car. The doors are open to let the natural light in, even though it's a freezing cold October day, and partly out of laziness so Aaron doesn't have to stop working until another customer speaks to him. 

After a while of just his tinkering and the radio for noise, Aaron hears hurried footsteps then the doors banging shut to suddenly plunge the garage into near-darkness, except for the spotlight lamps in the corners of the room. Rolling out, Aaron jumps to his feet with a scowl that quickly melts into wide-eyed shock.

Breathing fast from probably running and still keeping the doors closed with his hands, Lachlan slowly twists around and has the audacity to smile. "Hello, Aaron." Aaron blinks hard and he snorts derisively. "Nope, you're not dreaming. I'm here. I'm here to see you."

Frozen in place, Aaron tightens his grip on the screwdriver clutched in his fist and briefly glances at the smaller, dark blue door to Lachlan's right. He couldn't help himself trying to think of any opportunity to leave and his heart sinks as Lachlan catches him in the act; quickly grabbing a large piece of pipe leaning against the wall to jam it into the doors before he bolts and padlocks the smaller door. Aaron has the key in the pocket of his overalls of course, but he needs to get close enough to use it and Lachlan knows it. It makes him look cocky, like he has this all figured out, even though Aaron notices his unkempt hair, grubby prison sweats and his dirt-streaked, flushed face.

He's escaped.

The proof is he's standing in front of Aaron, but the words popping into his head seems to make it more real. He has no idea how, not sure he wants to know all the gory details. In fact, all he wants is to know one thing.

"What d'ya want, Lachlan?"

His blue eyes flicker down to the screwdriver. "For you to put that down, for a start,"

"No chance." Aaron sneers, feeling at least a little protected with a potential weapon in his hand until Lachlan looks near him and his grin widens. A chill runs through Aaron at the sight.

"I was hoping you might say that."

He flips a hammer into his fingers, testing the weight, and Aaron swallows, fear spiking for the first time. He hopes it's not crossed his face yet and unwilling to be a sitting duck, he breathes in and charges at him.

Quick reflexes.

Dodge.

Try again.

Lachlan defends, but it strikes Aaron that he's not being that aggressive, considering he's murdered god knows how many people. Maybe he's counting on Aaron tiring himself out, so he consciously tries to be smart about this and eventually manages to grab Lachlan around the neck first and slam him forward into the blocked doors, following him to squeeze his forearm against his neck. He splutters and flails and Aaron feels the anger and fear mix together and he tenses rigidly as Lachlan suddenly stops fighting. The pause is confusing because surely he - he can't be - 

Pain shoots through Aaron's abdomen as Lachlan elbows him so hard he stumbles backwards, winded and without a weapon, the screwdriver lying on the floor because of their earlier fight.

"Fine," Lachlan coughs, his expression darkening. "We'll do this the hard way."

Unable to gain his strength quick enough, Aaron falls inelegantly onto the concrete when Lachlan aims a kick at his stomach. Clearly he's not been a meek little thing behind bars. Giving him space to move, he picks up the hammer again and Aaron would flinch if he wasn't already writhing from the intense pain suffocating his body, making it difficult to think, let alone move, and Lachlan stands over him to grab the front of his overalls, other arm raised.

Aaron's indignant rage leaves in a puff of smoke and ice floods his veins. So, this is how it ends for him. Back in the place where he once actively tried to find a way out of this life.

"You wanted to see me so you could finish me off?" he wheezes.

Lachlan shakes his head. "No. I wanted to see your face when I tell you that I know you were gonna meet Robert today, but that's not gonna happen. Robert's a bit busy, bleeding out all over the floor in your tacky excuse for a home." Aaron frowns, wants to believe Lachlan is bluffing to cause him emotional as well as physical pain, but then he hears sirens in the distance. "Yeah, now you get it. Robert ruined my family long before I even knew how. I made sure he knew I was gonna take everything from him and that includes you. I'd say sorry, but you've been a pain in the neck since you shoved me in the boot of your car and left me to drown."

"But you didn't!" Aaron says, his focus all over the place because he still hear sirens and the thought of them being too late and of him not able to help is killing him enough. "Robert went back for you!"

"His mistake," he smirks. He raises his arm more, ready to swing. "See you never, Aaron."

Even in the last few seconds, part of Aaron wants to keep staring at Lachlan, trying to make sure he's haunted maybe years from now by watching him die, but the movement is too quick and Lachlan strikes.

Much worse than before, another wave of pain blooms and splinters and Aaron's world instantly goes black.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There's no sirens anymore.

But Aaron's head hurts. Why does his head hurt if he's dead? Surely that's unfair? He's not sure he ever believed in a definite Heaven, but shouldn't he be 'at peace' now?

_Robert. Maybe I can find Robert._

The thought comes to him unbidden because, it seems, Robert isn't far from Aaron's thoughts, alive or dead.

His eyes flutter. He tries to open them, but it's difficult, like something is weighing them down. He takes a breath to try again and coughs instead, a headache pulsing. The air doesn't feel right. It feels heavy like his eyelids in a way, oppressive, like wading through thick fog. Third time lucky, he opens his eyes blearily to see he can barely see anything at all because of the smoke. He coughs more violently and his head protests.

None of this makes any sense.

"I knocked you out," a familiar voice says to his left, startling him. "Your face," Lachlan chuckles, thoroughly amused.

"I'm not dead?" is all Aaron can think to ask.

"Not yet," he answers. "What, didn't think I'd let you off that easy, did you?"

Aaron wouldn't call having his head caved in with a hammer as 'easy', but he's sitting with a psychopath. He's sitting. The realisation comes to him slowly, but he's inside a car, the one he was fixing before all Hell broke loose and brought the spawn of the devil with it. The smoke isn't an illusion either and he does have the most horrific headache ever. Aaron lifts his hand to check how bad the blow to his head is, but he finds he can't move more than a few inches.

"What - "

Lachlan tuts over his confusion. "God, you really are slow, aren't you? What did Robert ever see in you?" Even though he knows it's futile because he's somehow trapped, Aaron wriggles at the mention of his husband. "It's been way more than two minutes now, by the way. He's definitely dead. And you're trapped in here, with me."

He remembers being awake and Lachlan telling him that Robert was bleeding out at the Mill. That Lachlan had hurt him and he was going to die, alone and as scared as Aaron is now. Tears well up in his eyes and he wriggles more forcefully, wanting to scream in agony as he tests his bonds.

"I've tied you to the seat, so there's no point doing that," Lachlan croaks.

It's the first time Aaron's heard him sound affected by something and it dawns on him that whilst he's torturing Aaron, he's not doing himself any favours either. And torturing him he is. Aaron _wanted_ to kill himself that day eight years ago, here in this garage with a running car engine and a blocked exhaust, carbon monoxide choking his lungs to the point of unconsciousness and, he learnt later, his heart eventually not beating. Adam performing CPR more than likely saved Aaron's life.

But no one is coming for him today.

"You're sick!" he spits.

Lachlan shrugs, leaning back against the headrest like he's getting comfortable for the long haul. "I prefer resourceful. Poetic, even."

"Let me out!" Aaron growls, not ready to give up. "I swear to god, Lachlan - "

He smiles, eyes hazy as he lets the gas start to take hold. "Or you'll do what? The car is locked, we're barricaded inside this garage and you'll finally die the way you were meant to. You've been living on borrowed time."

Aaron slumps in his seat, tears of grief and frustration falling down his cheeks as he coughs and coughs, fighting the only way left to him. "How did you know? I never told you."

"You told Robert though." Aaron looks at him, frantically trying to work this out before he falls asleep, but Lachlan lets him have this. "There's plenty of ways to get information, even without being in the room. Come on, you two should know this. I bugged your precious little flat. And very useful it was too."

"You were listening to us?"

"Yeah." He seems proud, despite him closing his eyes. It's as if he and Aaron are sunbathing on a beach, not sat in a gas-filled car. "I heard everything, unfortunately. Couldn't risk that manipulative coward you call a husband stumbling across a camera, so I stuck to audio." He tuts as Aaron runs through the memories of how their home has become what he thought was a safe space for them, a place they could talk and be honest about all their thoughts and feelings, together and as individuals. "Having to listen to you freaks spilling your guts then getting off on it before the little kiddies come home, like it turned you on how pathetic you both are." Feeling nauseous, Aaron watches his eyebrows raise with a thought and then turn his head towards him, opening his eyes. "Y'know, I'm pretty sure Robert used to do that with Mum, have her on the sofa like he couldn't help himself. Y'see, you're not special, Aaron. Never were, never will be."

Lately, Aaron's felt an inner strength he hasn't had before but despite rationally knowing Lachlan's saying these things on purpose, they still sting. The anger returns except Lachlan's face is smoothing out and Aaron suddenly gets it. He's finished what he wanted to do. He used him and Robert as motivation to escape prison, he's killed Robert and now he's going to kill Aaron as he kills himself.

"Lachlan, please - " he begs.

"Oh, five - stages of - grief - is it?" he asks in a faint, sleepy tone. "There's number - three - bargaining,"

"It doesn't have to be this way. Nobody has to die. You don't have to. You can stop this." Aaron hears his own voice wobble with every emotion overwhelming him as much as the carbon monoxide is. Lachlan is quiet for the first time. "Lachlan!" he croaks feebly into the silence, rocking hard in the seat because it's terrifying to die like this, but it's also terrifying to watch this play out in front of his eyes.

As much as he hates the things he's been saying, he'd rather Lachlan kept talking because the alternative frightens him to the core. Aaron doesn't want to die. He has so much to live for now and he sees that, crystal clear.

No grand speech to end it, Lachlan simply shut up and welcomed the situation. He looks roughened up from the experience, nothing like the fresh-faced boy who arrived in the village four years ago. His purpose about to be fulfilled, he's let go.

He's finally free.

Robert is dead and Aaron is stuck.

His eyelids grow heavy again and he feels light-headed and dizzy, the pain in his head subsiding as the tension falls out of his body and his limbs flop. His eyes roll back as he says a wordless goodbye, hoping that with this life cruelly ripped away from him, somehow, somewhere, he will get to be with Robert anyway. 

He hears a clap of thunder.

And then it's all over.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Beep. Beep. Beep.

The steady noise is what Aaron is aware of first and it brings him a strange sort of comfort. He does feel calm. Not exactly at peace as there's still a dull throb in his head and his lungs feel overworked. He had visions of the afterlife where he felt without flaw, no pain, no worries, just him, hopefully reunited with Robert.

At the thought of his husband, Aaron screws his eyes tightly shut. The noise flutters without pause, picking up speed. It sounds shrill to his ears, like a panic, and he's wincing when he hears something else.

"Aaron." Terror grips him by the throat. He'd know that voice anywhere, soft like it is now or shouting to the rooftops. It sounds like - is he - but what if he isn't? "Aaron, can you hear me? - Please, Aaron - Open your eyes - hey, somebody help!"

The beeping noise is like a warning, veering wildly, so unlike being sat in a stationary car filled with deadly fumes.

Suddenly, the noise starts to fall away.

He tries to grab it, but it's slipping from his grasp.

He feels lighter, less like he's choking on air, and his eyelids aren't heavy anymore. He's not sure he wants to, but he feels he might be able to open his eyes. There's a gentle touch to his hand. He has to be brave.

Slowly, he relaxes. The beeping returns to an easy rhythm.

He opens his eyes and his face crumples.

He's dead.

He's dead because Robert's leaning over him, expression knotted with concern. He squints through his tears and Robert inhales sharply.

"Aaron?" He looks up excitedly at someone else. "I think he's waking up! Aaron - Aaron, can you hear me?"

"No," he chokes out, finally finding his voice. His mouth aches, his head is sore and it can't be happening this way. "No, no, no!"

Footsteps move quickly away from the room and Robert frowns down at him. "Aaron? What's wrong? It's me - it's Robert,"

"No, no, no!" he cries louder, wrenching his hand from the warmth of Robert's grip but it doesn't dissuade him from trying a second time as he tries to steady Aaron by his shoulders. It feels too much like being bound. Trapped.

"Hey, it's okay," Robert says softly, "You're safe - you're safe, I promise,"

"You're dead!" he blurts out.

Robert looks stunned. How could he not know? Lachlan said he died before they did. "What're you talking about? Of course I'm not dead, I'm right here."

Aaron can feel his hands clutching his arms, but that's probably because they're both dead. If just one of them was dead, the other wouldn't be able to feel him. They wouldn't even be in the same room.

"You're dead!" he repeats, yelling and the tears streaming down his face.

The footsteps return with several more.

"What's going on?" someone demands. "Mr Dingle, let me - "

"Get out!" he cries at Robert, making him finally let go. "Get out! You're dead!"

"Mr Sugden, I think you'd better leave - "

Robert looks up sharply. "He's my husband, I'm not leaving!"

Relieved to be listened to, Aaron sobs quieten down. "Get out - get out - please - just get out,"

Strangely dejected, Robert leaves and Aaron feels his heart break into irreparable smithereens before the room slowly fades into darkness.

Now, he feels at peace.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aaron wakes up in a bed in a room at Hotten General hospital and carefully takes in his surroundings. The beep of the machine monitoring his heart. The pale blue of the walls. The empty chair to his right. He flinches when he looks to his left and Robert is sat there, elbows on his knees and head bowed. He's a distance away and Aaron feels like his heart wants to leap out of his chest just to be closer to him.

But it can't.

Robert shakes his head and their gazes meet. Aaron sees the dark circles under his blue-green eyes and how tightly he's clasped his hands as if he's stopping himself from reaching forward.

There's a gulf between them.

"You're - "

"Why do you keep saying I'm dead?" Robert interrupts, eyes skittering back down to his white-knuckled hands. 

"Because - " Aaron flounders, confirming to himself that he really doesn't know. "Because you are."

"Who says?"

"Lachlan - " he frowns, the memory so fuzzy. "Lachlan told me." He breathes out as the realisation slams into focus. "He said you were bleeding and you'd be dead before I got to you. He trapped me - he - he - "

Robert is on his bed in a flash and Aaron crumbles into his strong arms, pouring out the overflowing waterfall of anguish. He feels so solid, so warm, so _real_. "I'm here," Robert whispers in his ear, rubbing his back. "I'm here. I'm alive. We got you out of there."

"I'm - I'm so sorry," he whimpers tearfully, clinging on.

Robert cups his face with both hands. "Oi, don't you dare apologise," he says fiercely. "None of this is your fault. D'ya hear me? None of it. Lachlan lied to you and if he wasn't already dead, I'd finally finish him off myself!" A second later, he notices what he said and softens, stroking his thumb against Aaron's cheekbone. "Yeah, he did the world a favour and was dead by the time we managed to get the garage open."

It's a lot to take in. Lachlan lied about hurting Robert and now he's dead. Robert's alive and Aaron is too.

"He said he wanted to see my face when he told me that you were dying and I wasn't gonna be able to do anything about it," he mumbles with a shiver. He sees Robert's jaw twitch before he kisses Aaron's forehead and gathers him in for another hug. He's wearing his black jumper with the tan elbow patches that Aaron hasn't seen for ages and he smiles against his broad shoulder, rubbing his cheek into the material.

Eventually, Robert pats his back and pulls away a few inches, smiling too. It's so nice to see him smile it almost starts the waterworks again, but Aaron bites his lip to keep them at bay. "You should get some rest. You had a worst poisoning than me and Liv did that day you came home from Malta."

He lets Robert ease him back on the bed, raised but comfortable, and withstands his fussing with pillows and blankets until everything is perfect. "You said 'we',"

"Hm?"

"When you told me that Lachlan lied, you said 'we' managed to get the garage open. Who's 'we'?"

A smile of understanding crosses Robert's face. "Oh, er - I bumped into Liv at the pub. She said she came home for lunch, but I thought maybe she was bunking off from college already, so I told her I was meeting you and we'd talk about it then. But then you didn't show and I got worried. We were on our way home to check when Liv remembered that you were working at the garage. We knew something was wrong because we couldn't open the door and then the police turned up."

Sirens. Aaron remembers the sirens. He thought someone had called an ambulance for Robert in a futile attempt to save him.

"They tried to ask us if we'd seen Lachlan." Robert shakes his head in disbelief. "I couldn't believe it. He'd got out and I was fine, but the garage wouldn't open and then it clicked. The idiots thought me and Liv were trying to break in, so I told Liv to go and get Cain 'cause I'd seen him in the pub as well. Between all of us, we got the doors open."

"Wouldn't be the first time the police has broken down one of Cain's doors." Aaron quips tiredly. It barely raises a smile though and he puts his hand on top of Robert's. "Listen, you were right. I'm here, Lachlan's not, and we can put all this behind us.”

Robert tangles their fingers together, looking down at them. "I was so scared I'd lost you," he confesses, "and for good this time. We need to stop doing this. Even though she's not said much, I know Liv's been worried sick too."

"Well now there's one less murderer alive, we might have a chance."

"I love you so much, Aaron," he says, passion and love right there in his eyes and how he holds onto Aaron like he's taking strength and like he's the most precious person in his life all at the same time.

Aaron has never been happier to return the sentiment. "I love you too, Mr Sugden-Dingle."

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, lovelies x
> 
> I'm on tumblr at [theprincessed](http://www.theprincessed.tumblr.com). Come chat to me. :)


End file.
